Have you ever noticed how irritable many people get when they’re hungry?

It’s not about willpower—it’s about biology. Hunger triggers irritability because it’s your body’s way of demanding care.

Just like with hunger, moms experience this with all kinds of needs: sleep, rest, social connection, and even autonomy — and many of the moments we lose our temper are actually tied to some unmet need bubbling under the surface.

Cultural conditioning and societal expectations often teach moms to prioritize everyone else’s needs while ignoring their own. Many of us were raised to comply with others' standards, leading to a disconnection from our inner voice. We don’t even stop to ask, “What do I need right now?”

The first step to reclaiming your peace and energy is reconnecting with yourself and recognizing that your needs are valid. The second step? Finding creative ways to meet those needs that fit into your hectic schedule without adding more stress.

1. Sleep

Sleep is one of the most basic human needs, but it’s often the hardest to fulfill when you’re a mom of little ones. If full nights of sleep aren’t realistic, focus on energy renewal instead.

• Creative Solution: Micro-meditation sessions. Just 5–10 minutes of deep breathing while your baby naps can leave you feeling recharged. Apps like Insight Timer offer great guided meditation tracks for free.

2. Connection

Humans are social beings, and moms are no exception. The isolation that often accompanies motherhood can leave you feeling lonely and emotionally depleted.

• Creative Solution: Schedule “micro-connections.” Send a voice note to a friend while you fold laundry, or have a quick coffee date videocall as you prep lunch.

3. Rest

Rest doesn’t always mean sleeping—it can also mean taking a mental break. Many moms feel constantly “on,” and that's unsustainable.

• Creative Solution: Engage in a quiet hobby like journaling, drawing, or reading, even if it’s just for 10 minutes before bed. When you're tired, say no to "one more errand" and instead sit with a cup of tea or play with your kids.

4. Autonomy

Motherhood often feels like an endless list of obligations. The need to do something just for yourself—something that isn’t tied to your identity as “Mom”—is real.

• Creative Solution: Create a mini “Me Hour” once a week. Use this time to work on a project, learn a new skill, or simply do something you enjoy, like gardening or yoga.

5. Movement

Exercise releases endorphins and boosts energy, but finding time for a full workout can feel impossible.

• Creative Solution: Incorporate movement into your day. Dance with your kids, engage them in a little run race, or take a 5-minute stretch break during playtime.

6. Silence

The constant noise of a busy household can be extremely overwhelming.

• Creative Solution: Build a “quiet zone” into your day. This could be during nap time, early in the morning, or even while you’re driving (turn off the radio!). You can also challenge your kids to listen to "quiet" sounds by inviting them to stay silent and see what sounds they can catch.

7. Creativity

Creativity is a form of self-expression, and it’s a need often overlooked in the daily grind.

• Creative Solution: Start a small creative project you can chip away at during downtime—like writing, knitting, or scrapbooking. Remind yourself how this moment for a light-hearted activity can contribute to making you a more present mom, to avoid it slipping through the cracks or get buried under more urgent tasks.

Meeting your needs isn’t selfish—it’s essential. When you prioritize yourself, you show up as a more present, patient, and joyful mom.

Start small. Pick one need from the list that resonates with you. Ask yourself: How can I meet this need today? Experiment, adjust, and see where this leads you.

But be aware — connecting with yourself and reclaiming your wellbeing often involves having to ask for support, and that’s something many of us aren’t comfortable doing.

That’s why I created a free resource to help moms communicate more effectively using NVC principles.

With the Effective Communication Playbook for Moms, not only you’ll learn how to ask for support in a way that promotes understanding and collaboration, but you’ll also learn how to confidently express your boundaries and say no without guilt.

Because when your needs are met, it’s not just you who benefits—it’s your entire family.

> Download The Effective Communication Playbook for Moms here